Who among us thinks that they have the easiest job in America?
*everyone looks over their shoulder to make sure their boss isn't around*
Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is unafraid to answer this question. He did so yesterday after practice in front of his boss Jerry Jones, who was recently named a finalist for the Pro Football Hall of Fame Class of 2017, and a handful of reporters.
Before we get to his answer, it's important that we establish exactly what Zeke's job is. If we checked his Twitter profile (@EzekielElliott), we would find what we're looking for.
"Running back for America's Team."
How freaking awesome is this, by the way? I mean... seriously. I love how much Zeke loves being a Dallas Cowboy. I know you love it, too. I love all this love happening everywhere. Love!
So we now know Zeke's job. He's the running back for the Dallas Cowboys. This is what he gets paid to do professionally, and when the 2016 season kicks off for realsies on September 11th at home against the New York Giants... he's going to do it to a degree that is going to have us really loving him.
America's Team is an important name (it's also one that I've preached the importance and history of many times). Zeke takes great pride in being an employee for such a company, but he also does seem to think that it's a pretty sweet gig.
Ezekiel Elliott: "I think I probably have one of the easiest jobs in America. I get to run behind the best O-line in America.
The Dallas Cowboys Offensive Line is unquestionably the team's greatest strength. They're also unquestionably the greatest at what they do on earth, not just in America sorry Zeke, and as a result I've given them a nickname that transcends the entire planet - The Space Cowboys.
Running behind the Space Cowboys is a luxury that most running backs of sound mind (sorry DeMarco Murray circa March 2015) would greatly want. Zeke knows that, and he is prepared to take serious advantage of it. The hype around this element of the Dallas Cowboys game is justified, and if you believe my fellow Staff Writer Sean Martin's projections for the new-age Triplets then you know 2016 is going to be special for Zeke.
If you're reading this at work then I want you to stand up, find your boss, and show it to them. Tell them that you want a work environment as conducive to your success as Ezekiel Elliott has. Then take the rest of the day off. You deserve it. Huzzah.
Do you think Ezekiel Elliott has "one of the easiest jobs" in America? Is he destined for glory behind the Space Cowboys? Let us know! Comment below, Email me at RJ@RJOchoaShow.com, or Tweet to me at @RJOchoa!
REPORT: Dallas Cowboys Re-sign Long Snapper L.P. Ladouceur
L.P. Ladouceur is returning for his 15th season as the Cowboys' long snapper. The veteran free agent was re-signed by Dalals today to a one-year deal.
Thanks to Jason Witten's one-year sabbatical with Monday Night Football, Ladouceur has now been with the Cowboys for more consecutive seasons than any current player. He just turned 38 last week, but Louis-Philippe remains one of the top long snappers in football.
The Cowboys have signed long-snapper L.P. Ladouceur to a one-year deal worth $1.03 million and $90,000 in bonus money, but he will count $735,000 against the cap. This will be Ladouceur's 15th season with the Cowboys, tying Ed "Too Tall" Jones, Mark... https://t.co/2iDsi6RX7e
Retaining Ladouceur is an underrated move for the Cowboys given their situation at kicker.
Brett Maher was only 80% accurate overall on field goals last year. The team could be considering an upgrade in free agency.
Whether they bring Maher back or try someone new, having a long snapper with Ladouceur's performance perfection will make things much easier for them.
REPORT: Cowboys Negotiating Trade with Dolphins for DE Robert Quinn
According to a report just minutes ago, the Dallas Cowboys are visiting with Miami Dolphins' Defensive End Robert Quinn today as part of a possible trade. Miami is looking for a trade partner to try to get something back for Quinn before making him a salary cap casualty.
Quinn is in the final year of his contract and is set to count $12.9 million against the Dolphins' salary cap. Most of that is his base salary of $11.8 million, which Miami is reportedly willing to pay part of to help facilitate a trade.
Robert Quinn was spotted today on his way to visit the #Cowboys, who are in trade talks with the #Dolphins for the veteran DE, sources say. Quinn would need to agree to any deal. So, this is another step in the process, with a Dallas team that obviously needs pass rush.
The Cowboys need DE help with DeMarcus Lawrence's contract still unresolved and Randy Gregory now indefinitely suspended for another drug policy violation. They signed Kerry Hyder from the Lions yesterday, but he isn't a proven commodity like Quinn.
Turning 29 in May, Robert Quinn is a two-time Pro Bowler and former first-round pick of the Rams. He hasn't had the same production in recent years but still had 6.5 sacks for Miami in 2018 and 8.5 the prior year with Los Angeles.
Ever the bargain shoppers these days, Dallas is probably hoping to get Quinn for late-round draft pick or perhaps a pick swap.
REPORT: Police Detain Cowboys DL Tyrone Crawford After Bar Fight
According to TMZ, Tyrone Crawford was involved in a brawl at a bar in Panama City, FL last Friday night. The Dallas Cowboys defensive lineman and team captain was detained by police but apparently was not arrested.
The level of Crawford's involvement has not been substantiated, but TMZ's report does have him shoving police officers at some point in the action. The incident was reportedly captured by surveillance equipment at the bar.
Given that he was not arrested, one could assume that Tyrone was not one of the primary players in the melee. But that doesn't mean the NFL won't still review this matter as it relates to the personal conduct policy, and Cowboys fans know too well how "fair" that process can be.
This is certainly not a story you'd expect to see attached to Tyrone Crawford, who has been a model citizen and leader since entering the league in 2012.
Dallas elected to keep Crawford this season despite solid potential savings. He will count $10.1 million against their 2019 salary cap, which is high for his average production. However, he can play multiple positions and is one of their most experienced players.
Even if Tyrone were to get suspended by the league, it likely wouldn't be more than a one or two-game ban given his record and reputation. It shouldn't change anything about his status with the team.
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